Another breakup, another chance at getting married blown, another supposedly great love that has said goodbye. My career is meandering along more badly than well, the big career leap has failed to happen to this day, and so nothing ever came of my Louboutins either. That is what my life looks like right now. More than boring. So I decided to give my life some momentum and kill two birds with one stone. I will become a millionaire's wife. I have only one hurdle left to clear: How do you become a millionaire's wife?
First of all, you should of course spend time where millionaires are. And by that I mean high-society events and not the red-light district. I thought the movie "Pretty Woman" was rather nice, but I don't really believe the same will happen to me. To move the project "How do you become a millionaire's wife" forward, I now ask Google about events near me. Events do take place, but most can only be attended with a personal invitation or a ticket to the VIP area. For someone from the working class like me, unaffordable. So a new plan is needed. Maybe for the enterprise "How do you become a millionaire's wife" I don't need to attend an expensive event, but just the after-show party. A little drink at a bar could help there. Of course I can't look like some country bumpkin, no millionaire wants a woman who isn't presentable in public. So I jot down a little list of how to get my looks in shape.

How Do You Become a Millionaire's Wife - To-Do List:

  • Hair salon visit
  • Manicure
  • Pedicure
  • New outfit

How Do You Become a Millionaire's Wife? - With a New Look!

After checking everything off the list, I can start the project "How do you become a millionaire's wife" and head to a bar. Judging by online reviews, you can find an especially large number of attractive, wealthy men here. Two hours later I am already on my way home. Somehow I must have misread the reviews, because neither attractive nor wealthy men hang out in this bar. Who would have thought that the project "How do you become a millionaire's wife" would turn out to be such a difficult undertaking.

How do you become a millionaire's wife


Since I have now failed at two options, I consult the World Wide Web. I type in "How do you become a millionaire's wife". There are endless tips here, from charm school for gold diggers to the adult entertainment industry. Fake breasts, fake lips, an unnaturally tight face. My hair salon visit probably wasn't enough after all. Looking at these women, maybe I'll give it another try with Mike. And as for the millions: I think I'll play the lottery.